Friday, December 3, 2010

I'm back. At least for now.

I've been a terrible blogger lately, for obvious reasons, but with the holidays here, it's only getting harder to keep up. It's been a little rough lately, the fatigue has got the best of me unfortunately. The hardest part is that I have young kids to take care of ON TOP of taking care of myself, and I just want so badly to feel normal and do normal things again. But I know I have to be patient. My doctor, along with some other patients who have gone through the same treatment, have told me that it will probably take 3 months to feel normal again. That seems like an eternity when you have young-ens to care for. It just doesn't seem fair sometimes.

On top of the fatigue I've been battling with, it's been a tough week mentally too. I'm nervous for the scans coming up, just praying that the last tumor will be completely gone so I won't need surgery. And I just haven't been feeling as positive about things as I normally do, probably because I physically feel so crappy. I just need to get out of this slump so I can move on and concentrate on the "miracles" that have already occurred and that I'm healing. I do know that I have been blessed and that God is watching over me everyday. There are so many good things that have happened in our lives.

This quote has been a good reminder to me this week, "Some days there won't be a song in your heart. Sing anyway." ~Emory Austin


Courtney said...

You be gentle with yourself. And call me when you need a nap to rest, a pedicure or other girls day out (I'll find a sitter for all our hooligans), or ANY OTHER THING. You hear?

I love you!

Rebecca and Andy said...

I completely understand. I have been struggling with the same issues. They stopped the biochemo because it wasn't showing fast enough results, and swithced me to a three chemo. mix. I am slated for my next round of tests and scans at the end of December. The waiting is the WORST. I will most likely have two more surgeries, bringing me to a total of five over this process. Hang in there. My favorite quote is still, "this is better than the alternative".

Andy Wileman Stage 4 Melanoma

diarydays said...

Your story is very touching. I truly look up to you. You can find the details of my story on my blog. I am 22 years old and just found out last month that I have melanoma! Your positivity, and courage has lifted my spirts! I hope you are doing well, and relaxing, my thoughts and prayers are with you!